Observation
Personally, we may be hitting a wall, but it will pass!
I am writing this in a converted brick shed in a strangers back garden in deepest rural Yorkshire. At the last minute my wife and I decided we would benefit from getting away for a change of scenery courtesy of AirBnB and despite a six hour drive, no smart TV or Sonos system, inferior views and a lack of power showers, it feels wonderful. The reason is perhaps no surprise - recently we have had enough, COVID has gone on too long and it is getting to us, we needed a break from the routine.
According to Professor Aisha Ahmad, who has considerable experience of some of the world’s most stressful regions, we are unlikely to be alone in this. In her view, the stress from this pandemic is every bit as real as being in a war zone or natural disaster. Encouragingly her experience suggests that:
After 6 months it is very typical to be emotionally overwhelmed by the environment you are in, she refers to it as ‘ The Wall’
During this period we shouldn’t be too hard on ourselves - meeting our obligations, being kind to our loved ones and looking after our own physical and mental health - is in reality an A* performance
It will pass, just hang on in there!
“So, dear friends, do not despair of the six –month wall. It’s not permanent, nor will it define you in this period of adversity. Trust that the magic that helped you through the first phase is still there. Take a breath and a pause. You’ll be on the other side in no time!”
Professor Aisha Ahmad, October 2020
Current Leadership Challenge
How are you shaping the key leadership conversations?
“There are decades where nothing happens; and there are weeks, when decades happen”
Vladimir Llyich Lenin
My wife Julie is really smart. She has degrees in psychology, psychotherapy and art. During COVID, while I have been reading weighty tomes about male titans of the past, Rockefeller, Truman and Churchill, Julie has been reading, or rather listening to, some of the current most influential books on race and gender. I like to think that I too am reasonably intelligent, empathetic and progressive but when we have tried to talk about the issues involved, we invariably end up with a clunky conversation which feels frustrating. I have been trying to understand this, as our conversations are usually not like this. While I might not like admitting it, I think a large part comes down to me, in terms of not having a good enough language or indeed a meaningful enough understanding of the core issues to easily engage in our conversation.
If that’s an issue between two smart people who know, trust and like each other as much as we do, then how much more difficult will it be to have such conversations amongst leadership teams that are under stress, short of time and know each other much less well?
If Lenin’s right and we are in one of those accelerated periods of change, which it certainly feels like to me, then it’s not just diversity that leadership teams needs to grapple with, but also the implications of a vastly accelerating digital world, huge shifts in customer behaviour, a radical shake up of ways of working and an increasingly splintered world of the haves and have nots.
Finding the language and genuine insights, let alone creating the time, relationships and environment to have the critical conversations feels to me like a very significant leadership challenge. I suspect the consequences of failing to have good enough conversations are likely to be much more significant for those teams and businesses than they are for Julie and I.
For me, shaping and enabling the leadership conversation is one of the most critical tools that the leader has and never has it been more important and relevant than now.
PS My EA is also called Julie. A top tip is to try and avoid having your life partner and work partner sharing the same name. Not only is it confusing to your contacts but it can get quite embarrassing, especially when you use the wrong emoji!
Practical Action
Creating Great Leadership Conversations
In my experience the following are critical parts of having meaningful leadership conversations:
Clarity
Be clear on why you are having the conversation and what key question(s) you are addressing. Make sure you differentiate between those very few conversations which will meaningfully affect the future viability of the business and the many conversations which have to take place as part of business as usual.
Expectations
Set out what great looks like, over what timescales and what you expect in terms of engagement from others, both quality of input and behaviour. Some conversations may legitimately take years and others may need to be addressed in the next few weeks, shape them accordingly.
Support
Make sure that all the necessary support; resource, education, preparation, facilitation, write up, decision making and crucially follow up, is in place. A critical part of this will be the quality of the provocation ie: how are you going to get the richness of input which meaningfully moves the conversation forward eg: It is unlikely that six male, pale and stale board members are going to meaningfully move the dial on diversity.
Ownership
Take personal ownership for the quality of the conversation; role model how you want people to take part, explicitly talk about how the conversation is going, give and seek feedback and check understanding. Often the leader has the most holistic view of the challenge, don’t be afraid to acknowledge that and take the lead. Just make sure you listen to the input of others.
Be passionate
If it matters, then show it!
Act on it
Capture the best description you can of what you have agreed, work through the practical applications (at least some of them), communicate it and invest in educating and engaging others so that they can understand, own and act on the outcomes of your leadership conversations.
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